Found a lost Marissa journal entry...

I, originally, thought about writing 'Love but Never' in 1st person, with the journal entries. This is a cut scene from the book.



Our sex is always hungry, like we both have this craving only the other can quench. There is always so much passion involved. It's like he engulfs me with his kisses and sends my head swimming, like being drunk, only better. We started out on his small but comfortable bed. He handled my breasts like no one ever has, with care, but rough at the same time. He positions me over him and I find his way into me. We've never had to aim, he always just slides in. At first, he controls my hips as he kisses me. His lips rarely ever leave mine, and if they do we just stare at each other. Occassionally we talk, but the only sounds that escape are moans. We never guide each other verbally, we always just know and follow each other's lead. The sex is far from perfect. He slips out occassionally and other times legs get caught as we change positions. A slight chuckle escapes when this happens because we are used to it. The Prince song "Gett Off" has nothing on the number of positions we get ourselves into. At one point he was off his bed, kneeling on the ground and I was leaning over the side. He kept moaning my name and running his nails down my back as he continued to pound into me. I can feel him getting closer and closer. And he starts to communicate. He starts to tell me that I'm driving him crazy and that he can't hold it much longer. He asks me where I want him to come, but orgasm starts to overtake me again, and he asks if I'm going to cum for him, I breathlessly whisper yes and topple, moaning his name over and over. He tells me he can't hold any longer and I tell him to come on my chest. I gasp as he pulls out of me and kind of whine, but all is forgotten as I fell his warmth on my chest and I watch as he cums on each breast and they glisten from the moonlight shining in from the window. He hands me one of his famous white t-shirts to clean myself off and when I'm finished, he tosses it in the corner of his room. We find our clothes in the dark and he walks me to the door. We are less quiet then when I arrived, although it is nearly 3AM now. Outside, he kisses me and mumbles something about having to get up early and I talk about going hime to sleep in. He growls at me, but kisses me again and tells me to be safe and to wear a seat belt on the way home. As I'm walking to my car, he tells me to call him tomorrow. He always tells me to call him. He always tells him that I drive him crazy. He always asks "was it at least decent?" He's so insecure. I wonder how he got that way, because he is gorgeous and funny. I need to get over this, because I know it'll never happen.